routine

Every weeknight we start our routine as we always do. At 0800 P.M. Carol takes her bath, opens the bedroom window, and turns on the fan. The fan is on whether it is summer or winter. There is no heat on in the bedroom the circuit breaker is pulled for the electric baseboard heaters. I usually come in and set the alarm clock for her to get up at 0545 A.M. She never needs the clock. She always wakes at 0530. I go into the living room and watch TV or as I am watching TV, read a book. At 1100 P.M. I come into the bedroom, Take my bath in the Master bathroom then open the bathroom window. I put on my stocking cap (it is cold in here) Thank goodness no one can see it! Get in bed. I then start saying my prayer. It is a very long prayer and sometimes, if I fall asleep in the middle of it I have to start over or if I remember where I am I continue. I start by asking for forgiveness of my many sins . I ask God to take care of Carol. Next are the kids, my brothers, my Aunts, Uncles cousins friends. Then the difficult part comes. Every person who asked for a prayer or I think needs a prayer is prayed for. Sometimes I try to say the " Lord’s Prayer" It usually takes me four times before I get it right. Last night something strange happened. I usually listen to make sure my heart is beating just before I go to sleep or say amen. This time as I wait for that next beat I experience a time anomaly. It seemed it was a millisecond, a space continuum between my life and death. As I stepped into this crack in space I find myself on a gigantic plain. I see all sorts of people in line. The closest to me are a brother and sister who died at their birth. . Next were my Father, Mother, Uncles, Aunts, and Grandparents. They continue all the way to the beginning of time. There is every race every religion every creed. I see certain characteristics of them in me. There is a large screen that we all turn towards and there from the beginning is my life. Every time I do something good the hoard of people applaud. Every time I do something wrong they cry. Even though I am living my life all over again it takes only a millisecond. I recognize that the hoard of people is actually each only as large as a particle in an atom and each are only a portion of the whole picture. I see the hazy outline of this magnificent hoard as only a portion of a much larger figure. As I look at this magnificent figure I hear my heart beat and I am back in my bed. I look at the clock and it is 0222 The same time I always wake up and have to go pee. I get up and go sit on the commode. I no longer trust my aim at this time of night and who will ever know? I get back in bed and go back to sleep. I remember nothing of my dream. I just know I will wake again when Carole gets out of bed.